Liquidity Archives - Page 4 of 5

Cryptocurrencies Still Not Worth the Effort to Understand Their Prices

Cryptocurrency is still trying to get its act together after a series of failed attempts at legitimacy. It's like watching a group of monkeys try to […]

Kevin Nelson August 15, 2024

An illustration of five hot air balloons in various colors floating above the cityscape, each balloon representing one of the newly introduced tokens (bMSFT, bGME, bMSTR, bTSLA, and bGOOGL). The balloons are tied together with a rope that forms an arc shape. In the background, there is a subtle image of a blockchain network represented by interconnected nodes and lines. A few birds fly around the hot air balloons, adding movement to the scene. At the bottom left corner of the illustration, a small cityscape can be seen in silhouette form.

Crypto News

Tokenization Nation Strikes Again – Welcome the Latest Batch of Equitied Hot Air Balloons

Here we go again! Another bunch of numbskulls trying to convince us that cryptocurrency has some sort of inherent value, this time by tokenizing equities. Newsflash: […]

Sam Rogers August 15, 2024

An illustration of an investor holding onto their hat as it blows away from them amidst swirling financial charts and graphs with arrows pointing down; nearby is another chart showing inflows into ETFs while Grayscale's Ethereum Trust offloads funds. In the background are faint images of a calendar flipping to show four days of outflows followed by one day of gains, all set against a backdrop of falling mountains. The investor stands in front of an open door with 'Out' written on it and another closed door labeled 'In'. A small chart below shows net inflows still negative at -$405.

Bitcoin

Ethereum ETF Investors Finally Achieve Something Other Than Losing Money: Outflows Still Happen

The eternal optimists at Grayscale's Ethereum Trust (ETHE) have managed to offload an astonishing $120.28 million worth of ether-based assets this week alone! Meanwhile, their fellow […]

Sam Rogers August 15, 2024

An illustration of an investor sitting at their desk with stacks of worthless papers labeled "Ethereum" next to them, looking out the window as they watch money flying away from their basement apartment through broken windows and torn curtains. The room is cluttered with old furniture and trash while a faint image of a parent's voice can be heard in the background saying something about how things will get better someday. In the corner, an empty pizza box has "I'm sorry" scribbled on it. A small cat sits next to the investor looking worried as they stare at their worthless papers with despair.

Crypto News

US Investors Flee to Their Parents’ Basements After Realizing They’ve Invested in Something Called “Ethereum

The sweet taste of schadenfreude! It seems like some poor souls have finally realized that investing in Ethereum was not as bright an idea as they […]

Kevin Nelson August 15, 2024

An illustration featuring a person yawning while sitting in front of their computer screen displaying an endless list of Ethereum Name Service subnames and wallet addresses; nearby is another monitor showing a graph that appears to be flatlining, representing uneventful data. The room around them is dimly lit with shadows cast on the walls as if time has stood still since they last looked away from the screens. A faint glow emanates from their computer equipment in an otherwise darkened space;

Altcoins

Bitwise Unveils Utterly Underwhelming Revelation That Somehow Still Manages to Bore Us All Into Oblivion

It looks like Bitwise is trying to convince us that transparency in cryptocurrency is a unique feature - newsflash: it's just an attempt at damage control […]

Linda Williams August 15, 2024

Crypto News

Regulators Reveal Unsurprisingly Overwhelming Support for Their Own Regulations – 108 People Agree With Them

The never-ending circus continues as Hong Kong tries its hand at regulating something it clearly has no idea about - cryptocurrency. With 108 submissions from stakeholders […]

Kevin Nelson August 15, 2024

An illustration: A sinking ship with its stern rising out of water; people jumping off it while playing musical chairs on deck; one person left standing holding onto an anchor as others look back at him from life jackets. In background a Swiss flag and in foreground waves crashing against rocks. The title "Credit Suisse's Epic Fail" is written across the top with bold, distressed letters. A red circle around the ship indicates it has been marked for liquidation. At bottom of image an arrow pointing down into water indicating downward trend.

Altcoins

Credit Suisse’s Epic Fail: We’re Shutting Down Our Entirely Not-Even-Slightly-Stable Real Estate Fund, Yay Musical Chairs

It's official: one Swiss banking giant is so desperate it can't even keep its own real estate fund from imploding – but hey, at least they're […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration of a giant piggy bank overflowing with gold coins and dollar bills spilling onto the ground amidst broken chains symbolizing freedom from financial constraints. A smaller piggy bank sits at its base filled to capacity, while in the background an image of a 401K plan document lies torn on the floor next to scattered papers representing lost savings. The overall atmosphere is one of abundance and liberation. In the foreground, gold coins are seen being poured into another large container labeled with the US flag as it rises above the scene signifying growth and prosperity.

Crypto News

US Crypto Bro Reserve Accounts Now Hold More Money Than Most People’s 401Ks

The perpetual motion machine that is cryptocurrency has finally reached new heights with the introduction of nine Ethereum exchange-traded funds (ETF) and a whopping 10 billion […]

Kevin Nelson August 15, 2024

An illustration of a grandchild sitting at their desk eating ramen noodles while looking out the window with a sad expression on their face. In front of them is a computer screen displaying a graph showing Ether's stagnant price over time and in the background, there are images of Ethereum nodes working hard to process transactions as indicated by animated gears turning rapidly. The grandchild has an empty wallet next to them while outside the window, people can be seen walking with big smiles on their faces enjoying good times together.

Crypto News

Boomers Still Don’t Get It: Their Grandkids’ Crypto Investments Will Leave Them Eating Ramen Noodles Until They Die

Crypto-love is in the air and it's not just about romance! It seems like everyone wants a piece of Ethereum these days. Boomer Saraga thinks that […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration of a large whale swimming in an ocean filled with waves labeled as 'Market Fluctuations'. A smaller fish, representing Jump Trading, swims alongside it but appears to be heading towards shore. The background is darkened while the foreground remains bright, indicating uncertainty and turmoil respectively. In the distance, two other whales are seen jumping out of the water; one represents Paradigm VC with a red splash behind it signifying loss or sell-off, while another whale in blue signifies liquidity provision for trading activities across exchanges.

Crypto News

Jump Trading Secretly Controls All Your Money and We’re Only Finding Out Now Because One Guy Looked at Some Charts

The crypto world can be a wild ride indeed! It seems like Jump Trading has been making some big moves, transferring out 46.44M in ETH amid […]

Kevin Nelson August 15, 2024

An illustration of a hacker wearing sunglasses and holding a megaphone while standing on top of a pile of cryptocurrency coins with dollar signs flying out into space. In the background is an explosion representing chaos caused by DeFi hacks. The hacker's arms are raised in triumph, but their feet are slipping off the edge of the coin stack as if they're losing control and falling towards the ground below. A large percentage sign (57%) appears above them with a downward arrow pointing to the coins below.

Crypto News

DeFi Hacks So Good You’ll Want to Hack Yourself Just for the Thrill of Losing 57%

The grand finale for crypto exploiters seems to be near - or at least that's what they're hoping as their offchain attack vectors are getting more […]

Linda Williams August 15, 2024

An illustration of a giant beanie baby sitting on top of an empty crypto trading platform with red warning signs and broken screens all around him while he holds up his own Ponzi scheme sign. A few scattered coins are seen at his feet as well as some torn papers in the background that resemble contracts or receipts, hinting at the derivatives traded by users instead of actual assets. The beanie baby's face is a mix of guilt and panic with its eyes wide open while it looks down on the chaos below him.

Crypto News

Liquitrade LTD Caught Red-Handed Running Most Epic Ponzi Scheme Since That One Guy Who Sold Beanie Babies

And here we go again with another crypto exchange getting caught operating outside of regulations and ripping off their users! I mean who needs rules when […]

Kevin Nelson August 15, 2024

Ethereum

Ethereum ICO Whale Scores Life-Changing Windfall After Deciding Not to Panic and Sell at 3 AM on a Tuesday

Another day another dump in Ether's value because it turns out that even whales can't keep up with their own greed and get rich quick schemes! […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

Bitcoin

Altseason Delayed Again Because Apparently We Need Two More Price Targets to Hit

Oh boy do I love it when these self-proclaimed crypto "experts" come out with their ridiculous predictions. So now we need Bitcoin to breach $70K and […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration of an Indian Rupee symbol surrounded by 5 million tiny stars on one side and 420000 small leaves on the other, set against a bright blue background. A large tree grows out from the center with its roots deep into the ground representing stability while branches stretch towards the sky signifying growth. The digital rupee is shown as a glowing orb at the top of the tree shining down upon it. In the foreground tiny people are seen using mobile devices to make transactions, symbolizing ease and accessibility.

Bitcoin

Digital Rupee Proves Cryptocurrency Was Just a Fad All Along

Well well well! Look who's trying to make cryptocurrency look good for once - it's not going so badly after all, they're saying! Five million users […]

Linda Williams August 15, 2024

An illustration of a tethered balloon floating above Earth with its string being pulled upwards towards the moon. The balloon is surrounded by smaller balloons and coins that seem to be drawn out from it as if they are flowing into circulation. In the background, there's an image of a factory producing more balloons which appear to be getting ready for release. A few people in suits can be seen holding onto some of these new balloons while others look on with anticipation.

Crypto News

Tethers to the Moon as They Manage to Create Another Billion Dollars of Nothing Out of Thin Air and Sell It for a Premium

The eternal dance of cryptocurrency's biggest scam - stablecoins! It seems like no matter how many times we expose them for what they really are (numbers […]

Kevin Nelson August 15, 2024

An illustration of an old-fashioned money pump with blood dripping from it, surrounded by falling coins and dollar signs; at its base lies a broken Bitcoin symbol amidst scattered papers labeled 'ETF' and 'Losses'. In the background is a faint image of two people running away in opposite directions. The scene takes place on a darkened city street littered with trash cans overflowing with worthless currency notes, while above looms an ominous moonlit sky filled by fluttering dollar signs that seem to be falling towards the ground like autumn leaves.

Crypto News

US Crypto Bro ETFs Are Literally Bleeding Money Because Apparently Nobody Told Them That Investing in Bitcoin Is a Recipe for Disaster

It seems like another day, another dollar lost by crypto bros who still can't figure out that their precious Bitcoin ETFs are nothing but money pits […]

Kevin Nelson August 15, 2024

An illustration of an empty city street at night with only one car driving down it's center lane and a few people walking on either side of the road but all moving away from each other towards their respective directions. The sky is filled with clouds that resemble Ethereum blocks floating upwards, some are broken or fragmented while others appear complete. In front of the lone driver there's an arrow pointing downwards indicating decreasing gas prices as it moves further down into a tunnel where everything becomes dark and empty except for one small light in the distance.

Altcoins

Ethereum: Because Who Needs A Functional Blockchain When You Can Have Free Transactions And An Endless Supply Of Worthless Tokens?

The Ethereum blockchain is plummeting like a cryptocurrency-themed Hindenburg disaster - gas fees are at a five-year low! Who needs security and stability when you can […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

Crypto News

Hamilton Lane Unleashes Epic Fail: Multi-Billion-Dollar Asset Manager Wastes Entire Existence on Solana Private Credit Fund

Hamilton Lane's latest move into private credit fund launches on Solana is a joke right? I mean who needs traditional banking when you can just create […]

Sam Rogers August 15, 2024

An illustration of two hamsters facing off in an arena with one wearing boxing gloves. The other is holding up its paws as if defending itself from punches while also looking at something behind it that appears to be a large shadowy figure representing venture capital firms looming over the scene, but not directly attacking yet. In the background there are several smaller hamsters watching and cheering on their fellow competitor with one of them being shown in mid-air about to throw its paws up as if celebrating or warning others away from something.

Altcoins

Hamster Kombat Becomes First Crypto Project To Reject Venture Capital Overlords In Glorious Blaze Of Sanity And Profit

The hamsters are getting rich while you're still stuck in crypto hell! It's almost as if they know something about responsible gaming that all those other […]

Doug Martinez August 15, 2024

An illustration of a rollercoaster with steep drops and slow climbs on a track that represents price fluctuations. The coaster car is shown stuck between two hills at an inflection point where it could either continue to climb or drop back down. A few loose coins are scattered around the base of one hill, symbolizing lost momentum. In the background, there's a faint image of a chart with lines and waves that resemble Elliot wave theory patterns. The overall atmosphere is tense, reflecting the uncertainty in Solana's price action.

Altcoins

Solana (Sol) Price Down Today Because You’Re All Finally Realizing That Cryptocurrency Is A Scam And It’S About Time

You want me to write about why Solana (SOL) price dropped today? Well let's get this straight; it's because people are finally realizing that cryptocurrency is […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

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