The Economy Will Burn First and Then Politicians
Cryptocurrency: The Gift that Keeps on Giving (and Taking).
Interest Rates
$321 Million Floods Into Crypto as Fed Makes One Tiny Cut to Interest Rates and Suddenly It’s a BUYING SPREE!
Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water... or rather, invest your money into a Ponzi scheme with better marketing.
Crypto Experts Predicted Doom When Rates Went Up, Now They’re Saying Rate Cuts Will Save Them All
As a seasoned satirist of all things cryptocurrency, I must say that Bybit's head of institution is either delusional or just plain desperate. The guy thinks […]
BREAKING: US Money Market Funds Hit $6.2T and Suddenly Everyone Remembers They’re Still Broke Because Bitcoin Is a Thing Now
The never-ending saga of gullible investors throwing their money at a glorified Ponzi scheme continues. As US money market funds reach new heights of $6.2T, the […]
ETH CRASH PREDICTION CONFIRMED: You Won’t Believe the Shocking Reason Behind 40 Months of Unrelenting Despair (Hint: It’s Not Just a Coin)
The Ethereum slump: Because who needs inherent value when you can have nothing?.
8/23: The One Day a Year You Should Actually Listen to Cryptocurrency ‘Analysts’ Before They Get Fired Again
The cryptocurrency market is a never-ending circus of speculation and hype, with prices bouncing around like a rubber ball on a pogo stick. The so-called 'analysts' […]
It Can Only Go Up… Again!: The Mysterious Connection Between Rate Cuts and Crypto Bull Markets That Will Blow Your Mind (And Probably Not Happen This Time)
Rate cuts? More like Rate-sets-for-a-bull-market-gold-rush! The crypto bros are salivating at the prospect of another interest rate cut, and I'm here to tell you it's all […]
State Street Thinks You’ll Fall for Its Tokenized Assets Scam So Hard It Just Rolled Out a Whole New Division
Here we go again with another attempt by traditional finance to get in on the crypto gravy train. State Street is trying its hand at "digital […]
Lower Interest Rates Will Definitely Not Cause a Global Economic Meltdown This Time I Promise
The eternal optimist HashKey Capital CEO is at it again! Citing the potential for DeFi summer 2.0 because interest rates might drop (yay!) is a classic […]
Goldman Sachs Suddenly Realizes They’ve Been Wrong About Everything for Years, Still Somehow Manages to Keep Their Job
The eternal optimism of economists. Goldman Sachs thinks a recession is less likely? That's like saying your aunt at Thanksgiving says she's lost weight and you're […]
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