Bombshell! Meta’s Next-Gen Headset Axed in Bizarre Twist of Fate, Leaving Millions to Wonder if They’ve Been Scammed Into Buying Overpriced Glasses for Their Face!
Meta's Metaverse Mishap: A Cautionary Tale of Overhyping VR.
Business Environment
BREAKING NEWS! You Won’t Believe What Just Happened to the Guy Who Promised Us Endless Freedom on the Internet
Telegram's Durov Arrested: Because Nothing Says 'Freedom' Like Being Locked Up in a French Jail Cell.
YOU WON’T BELIEVE the Shocking Reason Why This AI Company Just Gave Away 10 MILLION DOLLARS to Struggling Startups
Fetch.ai: Because Who Needs Real Value When You Can Have Artificial Intelligence?.
Hong Kong Lawmaker Discovers Existence of Web3, Demands Adults Be Put in Charge Immediately
The blockchain bubble is bursting already? How delightful! It seems like those naive crypto bros are finally getting a taste of reality. A Hong Kong lawmaker […]
Nvidia’s Crypto Conundrum: A Billion-Dollar Slip-Up That Will Send Lawyers Scrambling for Their Wallets and Leave the Industry in Ruins
Nvidia's woes are not just about GPUs anymore - it seems like they're now fighting off frivolous lawsuits from crypto investors who think they were misled […]
Cryptocurrency Project Delayed Because They Finally Realized Their Code Is Trash and Now Everyone Has to Wait Even Longer
And there you have it folks: another cryptocurrency project (Ocean Protocol) delayed because they can't even get their act together! The Ocean Nodes Incentive Program was […]
China’s Highest Court Suddenly Discovers Cryptocurrency Is a Haven for Crooks
And here we go again! China's Supreme Court is finally catching up with what has been obvious since Bitcoin was first created: cryptocurrency is a scammer’s […]
Australian Regulator Finally Gets Off Their Lazy Behind to Do Something About the Entire Industry Being an Unmitigated Disaster
A bunch of cryptocurrency scams got shut down in Australia. About time too! It's not like we haven't been saying this for years: crypto is a […]
Franklin Templeton Invests Entire Life Savings in Avalanche Network Because Reasons
The crypto bros are at it again! This time they've convinced a major asset management firm like Franklin Templeton that blockchain is somehow revolutionary or innovative […]
Bitcoin ETFs Soar to New Heights While Ethereum Gets Left in the Dust With 77% Less Cash Flooding In
Well well well! Look at that - US bitcoin ETFs just can't get enough of each other's company (and by extension, their own inflated value). Meanwhile, […]
State Street Thinks You’ll Fall for Its Tokenized Assets Scam So Hard It Just Rolled Out a Whole New Division
Here we go again with another attempt by traditional finance to get in on the crypto gravy train. State Street is trying its hand at "digital […]
ETF Investors Discover It Takes 5 Whole Days for Funds to Abandon Sinking Ship
The crypto-love is strong this week! It seems like everyone and their grandma has decided that Ethereum ETFs are a great way to lose money - […]
Virtual Assets Are Now Officially Worth Less Than the Paper They’re Printed On
Ahahahaha! Look at this clown trying to regulate something that's inherently worthless - cryptocurrency! It's like putting lipstick on a pig, folks. The Seychelles government is […]
Dubai Court Suddenly Realizes Crypto Isn’t Actually Made of Unicorn Tears and Decides It Can Be Used for Normal Things Like Paying People
It's about time Dubai caught up with the rest of us who think cryptocurrency is a scam! Who needs to be paid in crypto when it’s […]
Crypto Bro Abandons Burning NFT Ship for Job Making Virtual Stuff at Facebook Because That Sounds Less Stressful
The great exodus continues! Another crypto bro flees the sinking ship of NFTs for the slightly less doomed waters of Silicon Valley. Jeff Nicholas, former creative […]
Eric Trump Unveils Groundbreaking Crypto Venture That Will Definitely Not Be Another Totally Predictable Failure of a Get-Rich-Quick Scheme
The Trump brothers' latest get-rich-quick scheme has finally been revealed: "digital real estate" crypto venture that's going to disrupt the financial world (yawn). Because what we […]
WazirX Restores Balances, Still Can’t Tell You When Your Money Will Be Yours Again
The never-ending saga of cryptocurrency's finest hour (or should I say, worst). WazirX has finally restored balances on their exchange, but let me guess what comes […]
MEV Attacks: Because What Could Possibly Go Wrong When You Let Bots Run Amok on the Blockchain and Hand Out Participation Trophies to Everyone Except Human Beings
The never-ending saga of cryptocurrency's greatest hits: MEV attacks! Because what could possibly go wrong when you give a bunch of bots free reign to manipulate […]
You Won’t Believe the Utter Catastrophe That Is This Weekend’s Crypto News – $5M Scam App, Illegal Miners and More Horrors Unleashed
The weekend wrap: where we round up all the crypto disasters that didn't make it into your local paper because they're not sexy enough for a […]
IMF Economists Shockingly Declare War on Crypto and AI by Proposing Electricity Tax: A Move So Bold It’ll Probably Be Overturned Immediately Because of Lobbying Fears
The IMF is finally catching on - those cryptocurrency bros are just a bunch of energy-guzzling numbskulls who can't stop whining about how they're being oppressed […]
Biden’s Secret Plan To Bribe Entire Population With Free Bitcoin And Make Everyone Instantly Love Him
The absurdity of it all! Democrats are now launching a "Crypto for Harris" initiative because, apparently, they think this will somehow help their candidate win. As […]
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