JPMorgan Unleashes Hell on Your Wallet: The Crypto-Powered Bank That Will Ruin Everything
Just when you thought JPMorgan couldn't get any more involved with crypto - they're now trying to be a blockchain bank . The news that they'll […]
Blockchain
You Won’t Believe the Insane ‘Time Machine’ Hack That’s About to Ruin Your Life (And Make You Question Everything)
Smart Contracts: Because Who Needs Immutability, Anyway?.
Crypto Developers Abandon Ship as Asia Takes the Plunge Into Total Financial Anarchy
Crypto's 'golden goose' has finally flown south - and it's not looking back.
Solana’s Desperate Cry for Attention: Institutional Investments Soar 54% as Big Players Laugh All the Way to Crypto Bankruptcy
Solana's 'Ethereum killer' status is starting to look like a fancy way of saying it's still trying to catch up with the big boys - and […]
VCs Go Absolutely Insane as They Blow Through Billions on Doomed Web3 Projects
VCs are throwing money at Web3 startups like there's no tomorrow... or a functioning economy.
US Treasury’s Secret Plan Revealed: How Blockchain Will Finally Let the Elite Cash in on Your Misguided Optimism
A 'New Financial Market Infrastructure'? More Like A New Way for the 1% To Get Rich Off Your Naivety.
You Won’t Believe the Utterly Ridiculous Reason Behind This Billionaire Backed Gelatos 11 Million Dollar Heist
Gelato's $11M Funding Round: Because You Clearly Need More Money to Waste on Blockchain Stuff.
You Won’t Believe the SHOCKING Reason Behind Chainlinks Latest Move That Will FINALLY Bridge the Gap Between Bankers and Hackers
Chainlink's attempt at being 'inclusive' is just a fancy way of saying they're trying to make TradFi and DeFi kiss and tell their dirty little secrets,.
Australian Banks Get Crypto Superpower: How One Company Will Let You Secretly Control Your Money With Blockchain
ANOTHER institution joins the 'we're going to use blockchain for financial stuff, but let's keep it super secret' club. Because who needs transparency and accountability when […]
You’ll Never Believe the Shocking Truth About Typing ‘Someium’ on Google (It’s Not What You Think)
Spelling your cryptocurrency wallet's name wrong could be a recipe for disaster... or at least draining all your funds into some scammer's pocket! Yep, you read […]
You Won’t Believe What Happens When You Stop Watching Bitcoin – The Shocking Truth About Altcoin Armchair Quitters
The world of cryptocurrency - where indecisiveness is rewarded with a participation trophy, and 'HODL' has become an Olympic sport. As I sit here sipping my […]
You Won’t Believe the Jaw-Dropping, Life-Changing Opportunity That’s About to Make All Your Cryptocurrency Dreams Come True (Tokenized Commodities Edition)
The latest get-rich-quick scheme from the crypto bros: Tokenized Commodities. Because what's more exciting than turning a pile of worthless digital garbage into something that sounds […]
Cardano’s Secret Sauce Revealed: How One Guy Saved the World From Scientists’ Boring Meetings
Blockchain-based DeSci: The Latest Fad from Cardano's Lap? (Or Maybe It Actually Works?) - Oct 10, 2024.
AXELAR’S NEW INTEROPERABILITY STACK IS LIVE: Because the World Really Needed Another Way for Cryptocurrencies to Confuse Each Other
The never-ending saga of cryptocurrency continues, with protocols racing for interoperability solutions like they're trying out for a spot in some sort of tech-themed Olympic event. […]
You’ll Never Guess the Shocking Truth About Your Genes: It Costs an Arm and a Leg! But Wait… Blockchain Might Save You From Financial Ruin!
The latest 'revolution' in genetics is here - DeSci (Decentralized Science) promises to make research more accessible, secure, and transparent by leveraging blockchain technology. Sounds great, […]
UK Minister Ignites Chaos by Embracing ‘Blockchain Gilts’ Despite Being Clearly Out of Her Depth
The UK's city minister Tulip Siddiq is at it again, pushing for blockchain gilts despite the government's concerns that she's about as informed on this topic […]
Binance Founder CZ Released From Custody, Immediately Declares Himself Visionary Genius Again!
} CZ's Big Exit: Because Who Needs a Real Job Anyway? Changpeng Zhao (CZ), the former CEO of Binance, has finally been released from U.S. custody […]
BREAKING: Crypto Apocalypse Ensues as Overhyped Firm Buys Another Random Company to Stay Relevant, Because That Always Ends Well
Just when you thought it was safe to go back in crypto-land... another day, another pointless acquisition by some overhyped company trying to cling onto relevance. […]
Blockchain-Based ID Verification Comes to China: Because Who Needs Actual Security When You Can Have a Fancy Computer Screen?
Blockchain: because who needs actual security when you've got 'self-sovereign' identities and a bunch of numbers on a computer? Zetrix, a Malaysian blockchain company that's somehow […]
Brazil Just Found Out That Being Able to Send Money Across Borders Faster Is Actually the Most Exciting Thing Ever!
Ripple's Brazilian Boondoggle: Because Who Needs Real Value in a Payment System Anyway?.
BAIN CAPITAL DUMPS $100M INTO LATEST CRYPTO WHITE ELEPHANT: Celestia Foundation’s Modular Data Availability Layer Protocol – Because What We Really Needed Was Another Blockchain Solution to Lose Our Life Savings
The never-ending saga of crypto bros trying to scam their way into relevance continues with the latest funding round for Celestia Foundation's modular data availability layer […]
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