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Crypto Hacks Soar to $1.2 Billion in 2024: Because Who Needs Customer Service When You Can Just Steal From Your Customers?

A cartoon hacker is shown breaking into a vault with a giant key while the contents spill out in coins representing cryptocurrency losses. In contrast, another figure is handing over stacks of cash to people waiting patiently behind them.

Greetings from the land of crypto chaos! It’s your favorite satire writer here to give you a rundown of this week’s ‘exciting’ events in the world of cryptocurrency. And what an exciting time it is, folks! With hackers stealing over $1.2 billion and Celsius finally repaying some (but not all) of its customers after going bankrupt – because who needs customer service when you’re dealing with crypto? The highlight reel from this week includes a 15% increase in stolen funds compared to last year, which puts them on pace to exceed the total value stolen in 2023. Yay, progress! And let’s not forget about Gavin Wood’s vision for Web3: free transactions and tattoos-based individuality solutions because who needs functional technology when you have ink? But seriously folks, it seems like these crypto bros are more concerned with making a buck than actually creating something useful.

Source: cointelegraph

Welcome to Finance Redefined, your weekly dose of essential decentralized finance (DeFi) insights — a newsletter crafted to bring you the most significant developments from the past week. This week brought troubling news: Crypto hackers have stolen over $1.2 billion in 2024, a 15.5% increase from 2023. Could they be on pace to exceed the total value stolen in 2023? In more positive news for investors, bankrupt crypto lender Celsius […]

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