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Credit Suisse’s Epic Fail: We’re Shutting Down Our Entirely Not-Even-Slightly-Stable Real Estate Fund, Yay Musical Chairs

AltcoinsCrypto NewsHack 2 Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration: A sinking ship with its stern rising out of water; people jumping off it while playing musical chairs on deck; one person left standing holding onto an anchor as others look back at him from life jackets. In background a Swiss flag and in foreground waves crashing against rocks. The title "Credit Suisse's Epic Fail" is written across the top with bold, distressed letters. A red circle around the ship indicates it has been marked for liquidation. At bottom of image an arrow pointing down into water indicating downward trend.

It’s official: one Swiss banking giant is so desperate it can’t even keep its own real estate fund from imploding – but hey, at least they’re good for an epic game of musical chairs. UBS Fund Management has decided that Credit Suisse Real Estate Fund International needs a swift kick in the pants to “preserve investor interest.” Because nothing says ‘preserving’ like liquidating and making everyone run for their money

Source: www.reuters

Credit Suisse real estate fund put into liquidation, UBS says
https://www.reuters.com/business/finance/credit-suisse-real-estate-fund-put-into-liquidation-ubs-says-2024-08-15/
BERLIN, Aug 15 (Reuters) - UBS Fund Management in Switzerland has decided to put the Credit Suisse Real Estate Fund International into an orderly liquidation as of Thursday, the bank said in a statement. The decision was taken following a comprehensive evaluation of the options available and in order to preserve the interest of all investors, the statement added.

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Barry Thompson

Barry’s crypto nightmare began when he bought Bitcoin at $3, thinking he’d stumbled upon the financial opportunity of a lifetime. He sold his stash at $100, only to watch in dismay as Bitcoin soared to absurd heights. Now, Barry channels his rage into scathing articles about the crypto circus, seething with resentment at the digital gold rush he barely missed. His motto: “I sold out at $100, but the joke’s on me because the real joke was believing in this absurd circus.”

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Disclaimer

The content presented on this site is intended solely for entertainment purposes and should not be taken as factual or reliable information. This site employs satire and humor to discuss global news, current events, finance, and cryptocurrency. The views expressed here are not meant to be taken seriously and do not represent the opinions of any individuals, organizations, or entities discussed.

Please be aware that the content may be exaggerated, fictionalized, or otherwise altered to create a comedic effect. It is not intended to provide financial advice, make accurate predictions, or offer any serious commentary on current events or financial markets.

Readers are encouraged to verify any claims or statements with credible sources and should not make any decisions based on the information provided here. This blog is not responsible for any actions taken based on its content. Always consult a qualified professional before making any financial or investment decisions.

Please do not hesitate to contact us if you have any questions or concerns.

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