Retail Investors

Crypto Scammers Get Served: Vietnam Takes Down Billion-Dong Bonanza in Most Epic Bust Ever!

Just when you thought the crypto scene couldn't get any more ridiculous, Vietnam comes along and dismantles another cross-border fraud ring that's been using fake cryptocurrencies […]

Sam Rogers October 7, 2024

A stylized illustration depicting the globe with interconnected gears, representing global finance networks, merging into a central hub labeled 'Swift'. In the background, fragmented islands are shown dissolving as they connect to form a unified whole.

Swift to Unleash Apocalypse on Global Economy by Merging Traditional Finance With Blockchain in 2025

Just when you thought the world was finally free from the scourge of cryptocurrency, along comes Swift, the venerable institution that has been keeping international transactions […]

Kevin Nelson October 7, 2024

An illustration of a stern-looking IMF official standing in front of an El Salvadoran flag with a red 'X' marked through it, while holding a large pair of scissors to cut down a bitcoin-shaped tree that's engulfing the country.

IMF Tells El Salvador to Stop Being a Bitcoin Enthusiast and Act Like an Adult for Once

The IMF is still trying to tell El Salvador that adopting Bitcoin as legal tender was a bad idea, but it seems like they're speaking into […]

Kevin Nelson October 7, 2024

A stylized illustration featuring Dubai's iconic skyline with several skyscrapers in various stages of construction or completion, symbolizing growth and development. In the foreground, a large building (Uptown Tower) stands out with its sleek design and vibrant colors, representing the hub for Web3 innovation. A subtle gradient effect suggests a bustling cityscape at night, while abstract shapes and lines evoke a sense of energy and dynamism.

BREAKING: Cryptocurrency Industry Finally Discovers Most Obvious Place to Put Office – Middle East!

The never-ending saga of crypto bros trying to make their dubious endeavors look legitimate continues! Cointelegraph has established an office in Dubai's DMCC Crypto Centre because […]

Doug Martinez October 7, 2024

A pig is seen being led away by a group of scammers in suits, while another pig looks on from behind bars. In the background, dollar bills are flying out of reach and people with worried expressions look down at their empty pockets.

FBI Discovers Shocking Truth: Crypto Schemes Are Actually Scams and People Lose Money!

Because you need someone from a government agency to tell you that cryptocurrency scams are bad. I mean, come on folks! It's not exactly rocket science […]

Doug Martinez October 5, 2024

An illustration depicting a person standing in front of a computer screen displaying a blurred-out internet landscape. The person is holding up their passport while looking over their shoulder at an unseen figure lurking behind them. In the background, various online platforms and messengers are shown being consolidated into fewer icons.

YOU WON’T BELIEVE THE OUTRAGEOUS NEW INTERNET REGULATION That Will Make You Question Everything About Online Freedom Forever

Yeah, because nothing says 'freedom' like being forced to show your passport to use the internet.

Barry Thompson October 5, 2024

A illustration depicting a sinking ship with 'Crypto ETFs' written on its side in bold letters. The ship is surrounded by waves labeled '$57 MILLION', while other ships nearby are shown to be rising up, representing the funds that have gained value. In the background, dollar signs and money bags can be seen floating away from the sinking vessel.

BREAKING: Crypto ETFs Imploding Like Your Uncle’s Ponzi Scheme, Losing $57 MILLION IN ONE DAY Because Who Needs Actual Returns When You Can Just Print More Money?

The cryptocurrency faithful are at it again! Spot ETH and BTC ETFs have been hit with withdrawals, losing a whopping $54.13 million and $3.2 million respectively. […]

Sam Rogers October 5, 2024

A roulette wheel spins wildly out of control as a giant coin crashes to the ground below it. In the background, two figures frantically try to grab onto chairs that are being pulled away from them.

You Won’t Believe the Shocking Truth About Meme Coins: They’re All Secretly Designed to Drain Your Wallet!

You've got to hand it to Mark Cuban - he's not afraid to call a spade a shovel when it comes to meme coins and their […]

Linda Williams October 5, 2024

BINANCE ON BRINK OF TOTAL COLLAPSE: Trading Volumes Plummet, Market Share Crashes Back to 2020 Levels – Is This the End of Crypto’s Favorite Son?!

There's nothing quite like watching crypto bros scramble when their precious Binance starts hemorrhaging trading volume. It seems that September was a particularly brutal month for […]

Kevin Nelson October 5, 2024

A Robert Kiyosaki stands at the edge of a fiery pit labeled 'Financial Doom', looking out with concern as an angelic figure in the distance holds up a sign reading 'Iraqi Dinars' while another devilish character whispers into their ear.

Beware the Fiery Pit of Financial Doom: Insane Investor Robert Kiyosaki Peddles Garbage ‘Investment’ in Iraq’s Most Dubious Currency!

Iraqi Dinars: The Cryptocurrency That's Almost as Scammy as Bitcoin - But Not Quite!.

Sam Rogers October 5, 2024

Binance Founder CZ Released From US Custody After Sparing His Billionaire Lifestyle a Whopping 4 Months of Discomfort

So CZ is outta the joint after serving his four-month sentence for being a reckless crypto bro who let terrorists launder money through Binance. I'm sure […]

Barry Thompson October 5, 2024

Crypto Bro’s Wild Ride to Prison: NY Judge Sends Tornado Cash Mastermind Packing, Trial Set for December

Just when you thought the crypto world couldn't get any more lit... Roman Storm is headed to trial for allegedly aiding in laundered cash through that […]

Barry Thompson October 5, 2024

A illustration of a courtroom scene, with Coinbase as the defendant in front of a judge's bench. The CFTC is depicted as a stern-looking figure holding onto documents, while SEC agents are shown trying to pry them loose. In the background, various cryptocurrency tokens (Solana, Cardano, etc.) are scattered about, some looking worried or distressed.

Crypto Bros Brawl: Coinbase Demands Secret Docs in Desperate Bid to Avoid SEC Smackdown… Because That’s Not a Recipe for Disaster at All!

Don't look now, but it seems the crypto bros are at each other's throats. This time around, Coinbase is trying to strong-arm the Commodity Futures Trading […]

Kevin Nelson October 5, 2024

An illustration depicting an Indian tiger emerging from shadows, symbolizing India's Enforcement Directorate taking action against a massive $48 million crypto scam linked to Chinese nationals and online gaming app Fiewin. In the background, a faint image of China can be seen with arrows pointing towards Binance wallets, indicating complex cryptocurrency transfers.

$48 MILLION CRYPTO HEIST EXPOSED: Binance Saves the Day (Finally!)

}In what's likely just another day in the life of cryptocurrency enthusiasts being scammed blindfolded by their own greed and gullibility - a $48 million crypto […]

Sam Rogers October 5, 2024

A illustration depicting a precarious tower made up of cryptocurrency coins on top of each other, with cracks spreading throughout its base as it teeters precariously above an abyss labeled 'Market Crash'. A few large whales swim beneath the surface, holding onto giant fish representing token supply. In the background, a group of venture capital funds are shown slowing their deployment into the crypto market.

BREAKING: Experts Warn That Bitcoin Is a Pyramid Scheme and You’re Going to Lose All Your Money… Again

The Crypto Market: Where Gullible Idiots Get Burned (Literally).

Sam Rogers October 5, 2024

A whale breaches through waves on the surface of an ocean filled with tiny fish representing individual addresses holding varying amounts of BTC. In the distance, larger sea creatures such as dolphins and sharks swim alongside a massive blue whale symbolizing institutional investors.

BREAKING: Cryptocurrency Miraculously Still Not Worth Anything After New Addresses Hold Tons of Made-Up Money

For those who don't understand why cryptocurrency never seems to deliver on its promises (because it's just numbers on a computer created from nothing), here are […]

Sam Rogers October 5, 2024

A illustration of a giant hand grasping onto several cryptocurrency coins floating away on a dark blue background, with chains linking them together as they're being pulled back towards it.

Crypto Scammers Get Busted: FBI Steals $6M Because Apparently They Have Nothing Better to Do

Another day, another crypto scam exposed by authorities who actually do their job for a change. The $6 million seizure is just a drop in the […]

Sam Rogers October 5, 2024

A of a smiling computer with a suitcase full of cryptocurrency coins next to it, surrounded by euros and flags from various European countries.

Robinhood Crypto Finally Figures Out Europeans Have Computers and Decides to Let Them Transfer Numbers Too!

}The latest move by Robinhood to attract gullible Europeans into their crypto trap is a doozy - they're introducing cryptocurrency transfers in Europe! Because what's more […]

Kevin Nelson October 5, 2024