TELEGRAM’S TURBULENT FUTURE: CEO Pavel Durov ARRESTED in France and UAE Is Freaking Out!
It's about time someone got caught. Pavel Durov, aka Mr. 'I'm above the law', Telegram CEO has been arrested in France for allegedly enabling cybercrimes on […]
News
You Won’t Believe the Utterly Ridiculous Reason Altcoin Season Is Still MIA
Crypto traders are so desperate for a return on their investments that they're jumping straight into buying the most ridiculous, worthless altcoins like PEPE and WIF […]
MACRON’S SHOCKING BETRAYAL: President Lures Telegram CEO Into Dinner Trap on Day of Arrest!
Just when you thought it was safe to go back online, along comes Pavel Durov, Telegram's crypto-loving CEO, getting arrested by French authorities and sparking outrage […]
IT’S OFFICIAL! You Won’t Believe the Outrageous Reason Why Trump Just Dropped Another 4 Billion Worth of His Face on Bitcoin
The 'Crypto President' Strikes Again: Because What America Really Needs is More of Donald's NFTs.
BREAKING: You’re Going Broke! ‘Google of South Korea’ Joins Forces With Chiliz Blockchain on New Crypto Wallet That Will Definitely Not Steal Your Life Savings!
Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water... or rather, invest your hard-earned cash into a cryptocurrency that's not going to […]
You Won’t Believe What Happens When You Combine Unstable Cryptocurrency With a Country That Can’t Even Balance Its Budget!
Stables Money: because who needs actual stability when you can have cryptocurrency?.
DOGECOIN GETS PUNCHED AGAIN: Court Finally Recognizes What We Already Knew, Elon Musk Has Been Manipulating You All Along
The cryptocurrency world's favorite punching bag just got punched again - and it still can't seem to get out of its own way.
MIND-BLOWING 667% GAINS ALERT: PolitiFi Tokens Soar as Reality TV Star Fuelled Crypto Chaos Continues to Baffle Experts, Trump NFTs Sell Like Hotcakes and We’re All Just Along for the Ride
}The perpetual farce that is cryptocurrency continues to entertain us all with its latest antics: PolitiFi tokens surging by an eye-watering 667% this year because, you […]
BREAKING: TON’s Blockchain Implodes Under Crushing Weight of DOGS Memecoin Launch Because Apparently Validators Were Too Busy Playing Solitaire to Clean Their Database
In a stunning display of incompetence, TON's blockchain has been down for hours due to an 'unusual load' caused by the launch of Dogs (DOGS), another […]
Nasdaq Thinks You’re Dumb and Wants to Make Money Off Your Bitcoin Fears!
Nasdaq's latest attempt at legitimizing a scam, because what every respectable financial institution needs is another way to enable crypto bros' get-rich-quick schemes. The company has […]
Aptos Network Joins Forces With Nillion to Create an Unmitigated Disaster of a Blockchain Ecosystem
} The latest from Aptos - because what's more exciting than some obscure blockchain network integrating with another equally unknown tech platform? We've got blind computation […]
BREAKING: Coinbase CEO Predicts Payments Boom Will Make You Rich (Just Like All the Other Times)
There's nothing quite like a good dose of delusional optimism to start off your day. Brian Armstrong, the CEO of Coinbase (and self-proclaimed crypto visionary), is […]
DOOMED: TON Trainwreck Derails Entire Internet, DOGS MemeCoin Causes Global Blackout (Because Who Needs Functionality Anyway?)
The TON trainwreck continues to chug along, leaving a trail of broken dreams and DOGS-themed merchandise in its wake. It seems that all it takes is […]
Hong Kong Retailers Rejoice! New Crypto Trading Platforms Now Available for You to Lose Your Life Savings!
Hong Kong's Retail Investors Get More Options to Waste Their Money on Cryptocurrency.
Ether ETF Inflows Suddenly Turn Positive, Because What Could Possibly Go Wrong With This Entire Concept?
After two weeks of crypto bros crying themselves to sleep at night because their precious Ether ETF inflows turned negative, BlackRock finally came through with a […]
CRYPTO SHAMANISTS STRUCK DOWN: SEC Cracks Down on Bumbling Bros Who Tried to Turn $60 Million Into a Hot Air Balloon of Lies
More crypto crooks caught in their own web of deceit! Who needs inherent value when you can just print numbers on a computer and promise unsuspecting […]
Crypto Hackers Win Again! Stole Over a Billion Bucks and Still Can’t Afford Avocado Toast!
The Crypto Con Game Continues...
YOU WON’T BELIEVE THE SHOCKING NEWS: Nigeria Finally Enters 21st Century With First-Ever Crypto License!
Just when you thought Nigeria's economy was still stuck in the stone age, along comes crypto to give it a nice veneer of modernity! Congratulations are […]
BREAKING: Elon Musk Unveils Groundbreaking Robot That Does Actual Work… Said No One Ever
Just when you thought Elon Musk's tunnel vision (pun intended) on autonomous cars was getting old, he goes and tries to pass off his Optimus humanoid […]
EU Law Enforcement Finally Catches Up: Crypto Bro’s Wild Ride Comes Crashing Down
The French are at it again! This time they're after Pavel Durov, founder and CEO of Telegram, for allegedly violating EU laws related to content moderation […]
BREAKING: We Finally Found a Bug That’s Not Completely Ruining Your Life, but Only if You Use This One Specific Product
The 'Wild West' of Cryptocurrency: Where Bugs and Scammers Reign Supreme (Again).
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