Barry "The Bitcoin Blunderer" Thompson

Crypto: Because Who Needs Stability or Security Anyway?

The never-ending saga of cryptocurrency's greatest hits (or should I say misses?). So, the SEC has delayed its decision on approving an ETF that tracks 10 […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

Altcoins

Eth Squeezes Out a Tiny Bit Less Blood Than Usual as Ethereum Mania Reaches New Heights and Everyone Still Loses Their Shirt

The Grayscale Ethereum Trust is finally bleeding less money after hemorrhaging nearly $2.3 billion since launch. I'm sure it's just a coincidence that this comes as […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration of a rocket ship blasting off into space with various digital assets and cryptocurrencies floating around it, some already on their way to orbit while others are still falling back down towards Earth; in the background there is an image of a cityscape at night representing growth and expansion. The rocket's trail behind it forms a path that splits into multiple smaller trails as if branching out into different directions signifying diversification and new paths being taken, with some parts forming stars or constellations to represent the future possibilities;

Altcoins

Get Ready: Crypto Gravy Train Just Derailed into a Bottomless Pit of Desperation as Regulators Give Thumbs Up to Even More Ways to Lose Your Shirt Investing in Worthless Digital Tokens

Because what's better for investors than a whole bunch of new ways to throw money at worthless digital tokens? Grayscale is thrilled that people are still […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration of an index chart with multiple lines representing different cryptocurrencies (SPX, DXY, BTC, ETH, BNB, SOL, XRP, DOGE, TON, ADA) moving in various directions; some are rising while others are falling. The background is dark blue and the lines have varying colors to distinguish between each cryptocurrency. A few arrows point upwards indicating buying pressure on certain cryptocurrencies like Bitcoin (BTC), Ethereum (ETH), BNB, Solana (SOL). Other arrows pointing downwards indicate selling pressure on XRP, Dogecoin (DOGE) and Cardano (ADA).

Altcoins

IT’S HAPPENING AGAIN: Cryptocurrency Prices Plummet into Oblivion for the 473rd Time This Year – Is It Even Worth Waking Up to Check?

The never-ending saga of cryptocurrency's attempt to be taken seriously continues! It seems like every week is Groundhog Day for Bitcoin and its altcoin friends - […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration: A large bear is seen walking away from a sinking ship with an anchor labeled "BTC" in it while another smaller bear runs towards a rising buoyant boat labelled "ETH". The background shows waves and the sun setting on the horizon indicating recovery. In the foreground are coins of different denominations floating upwards, some being caught by the small bear running to ETH's side. A few fish swim away from the sinking ship with an anchor in it while others jump into the rising buoyant boat labelled "ETH". The two bears have a contrasting expression on their faces;

Altcoins

Investors Flock To Ethereum Like It’S A Burning Building Because Who Needs Logic Anyway, Meanwhile Bitcoin Just Sits There Being The Actual Store Of Value As Crypto Markets Recover In Spite Of Themselves

The crypto bros are at it again! Flocking to ETH like a bunch of lemmings off a cliff because some new ETFs launched in late July […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration of an upward trending line with green arrows on top of a downward sloping graph representing Ether's price drop; in the background, nine small buildings are rising while one is sinking. The scene takes place at sunset over water with waves splashing against rocks below. A large sun sets behind the buildings casting long shadows across them. In the foreground, several coins and dollar bills float upwards towards the trend line as if being drawn to it.

Altcoins

Crypto Investors Still Throwing Money At Ether Etfs Like They’Re Trying To Set Their Wallets On Fire

The never-ending farce of cryptocurrency investing continues! It's like watching a train wreck in slow motion - you can't look away even though you know the […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration of an empty city street at night with only one car driving down it's center lane and a few people walking on either side of the road but all moving away from each other towards their respective directions. The sky is filled with clouds that resemble Ethereum blocks floating upwards, some are broken or fragmented while others appear complete. In front of the lone driver there's an arrow pointing downwards indicating decreasing gas prices as it moves further down into a tunnel where everything becomes dark and empty except for one small light in the distance.

Altcoins

Ethereum: Because Who Needs A Functional Blockchain When You Can Have Free Transactions And An Endless Supply Of Worthless Tokens?

The Ethereum blockchain is plummeting like a cryptocurrency-themed Hindenburg disaster - gas fees are at a five-year low! Who needs security and stability when you can […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration of the US Court building with scales tipping to one side as a coin falls off; below: Binance.US and CoinMarketCap logos are shown being pulled by strings held by figures dressed in suits representing investors; HEX token is depicted at the bottom, falling down like an object dropped from above. A diamond ring lies nearby on the ground amidst broken watches and cars. The scene takes place against a backdrop of descending lines resembling stock prices plummeting. In the distance: Richard Heart's figure stands alone looking away with his back turned to the chaos he created

Altcoins

Binance.Us Caught Red-Handed Again Because Apparently Nobody Has Learned Anything About Cryptocurrency Yet

Well isn't this just peachy! Another chance to talk about the utter dumpster fire that is cryptocurrency and how Binance.US has been manipulating prices on CoinMarketCap […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

An illustration of a rollercoaster with steep drops and slow climbs on a track that represents price fluctuations. The coaster car is shown stuck between two hills at an inflection point where it could either continue to climb or drop back down. A few loose coins are scattered around the base of one hill, symbolizing lost momentum. In the background, there's a faint image of a chart with lines and waves that resemble Elliot wave theory patterns. The overall atmosphere is tense, reflecting the uncertainty in Solana's price action.

Altcoins

Solana (Sol) Price Down Today Because You’Re All Finally Realizing That Cryptocurrency Is A Scam And It’S About Time

You want me to write about why Solana (SOL) price dropped today? Well let's get this straight; it's because people are finally realizing that cryptocurrency is […]

Barry Thompson August 15, 2024

Bitcoin

Bitdeer’S Mining Magic: We Doubled Our Profits And Now You Owe Us More Money

Oh boy, here we go again! Another "exciting" earnings report from a cryptocurrency company that's just trying to make it big by mining some numbers on […]

Barry Thompson August 13, 2024

An illustration of a falling arrow piercing through an inflated balloon with a red X marked on its surface; below is a graph showing a sharp decline and above are scattered stablecoins (USDT) being swept away from their designated place into unknown territories. In the background, Bitcoin's price chart shows it dropping below $60K mark while institutions' inflows of stablecoin to exchanges dwindle. A faint image of an ETF can be seen in the distance with a red minus sign above its entrance indicating negative outflows;

Bitcoin

Bitcoin Price Drops Below 59K As Institutions Suddenly Realize Stablecoin Fad Is Actually Just A Ponzi Scheme To Inflate The Value Of Their Other Investments

The plot thickens! Another day, another drop in Bitcoin's value because institutions have stopped buying stablecoins like they're going out of style (which, spoiler alert, they […]

Barry Thompson August 13, 2024

An illustration showing an exchange office with people rushing to get inside while others are trying to climb over walls and fences. The building has broken windows, torn shutters, and a sign reading "Closed" is hanging from it. In front of the building there's a table with papers scattered all around, some of them have red stamps on them saying "Withdraw". A person in the background holds up a megaphone shouting while another one points at him angrily. The sky above has dark clouds and lightning bolts are striking down to earth.

DeFi

Coinbase Finally Shows Gritty Resolve To Not Get Completely Sued By Feds

Oh boy, it looks like Coinbase is finally getting some things right... albeit after years of trying to scam investors with its overpriced and useless services. […]

Barry Thompson August 13, 2024

An illustration: A cartoonish image depicting a giant hammer smashing down on an evil-looking troll with multiple patents attached to its back; one patent is being torn off and thrown away, while another falls from above like confetti; MakerDAO and Compound Protocol logos are shown as shields protecting the scene. In the background, there's a faint outline of OpenSea marketplace where NFTs are displayed in various shapes and sizes. The atmosphere around the troll has an eerie glow with dark clouds suggesting chaos is being dispelled by the hammer blow.

Ethereum

DEF Buys Patent That Will Instantly Become Worthless As Soon As Someone Else Figures Out How To Sue Them Anyway

The patent troll drama continues! DEF buys a useless patent to save MakerDAO and Compound from getting sued by another worthless entity called True Return Systems […]

Barry Thompson August 13, 2024

DeFi

Trump’S Crypto Empire Implodes As Son Tries Again With Yet Another Garbage Platform Because Why Not

Oh boy, it's that time again - another crypto crash! Who needs a functioning economy when you can have wild price swings every few months? And […]

Barry Thompson August 13, 2024

Barry Thompson

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