Barry Thompson

Crypto Will Finally Be FREE at Last! Here’s How Trump’s Regime of Unbridled Chaos Will Make You Richer Than Elon

The Crypto Bro's Guide to a Trump-led Regulatory Free-for-All (Yawn).

Barry Thompson November 14, 2024

A illustration depicting a chaotic US Capitol building with lawmakers from different parties running wildly around it, some holding cryptocurrency-themed items like coins or laptops, while others are shown being dragged away by chains representing 'sanity' and 'common sense'. In the background, a giant American flag is torn apart, symbolizing the rejection of socialism. The atmosphere is one of anarchy and disorder.

Congress Goes Rogue as Crypto-Addled Lawmakers Declare War on Sanity and Common Sense

America Elects the Most Pro-Crypto Congress Ever: Because Who Needs Regulation When You Can Have Wild West Economics?.

Barry Thompson November 14, 2024

Bitwise Just Spent Millions on Staking Service – Now You’ll All Be Rich Too (Said No One Ever)

Bitwise's latest move is like that one aunt who just won't quit - always trying to expand into new 'opportunities' and somehow convincing everyone else to […]

Barry Thompson November 14, 2024

A illustration of Gary Gensler being dragged away from his desk by two figures representing 'The People', with chains and shackles symbolizing loss of trust, while behind him, a cityscape is shown crumbling under the weight of broken investor confidence and economic stagnation. In contrast, a new figure emerges in the background - an American flag waving high amidst rising financial markets and thriving businesses.

BREAKING: Gensler Resigns Under Pressure as Crypto Cartel Infiltrates Biden Admin

It's official: The crypto bros have found their new BFF in the White House. Following Donald Trump's election win, it seems like everything is about to […]

Barry Thompson November 14, 2024

You Won’t Believe the CRAZY New Way to Moon Your Crypto: Spacecoin XYZ Launches Plan for Orbital Blockchain Network That’s Totally Not a Recipe for Disaster

Space, schmace – the latest crypto moonshot involves launching a blockchain network in outer space because apparently that's where all the good money goes these days. […]

Barry Thompson November 2, 2024

You Won’t Believe the Mind-Blowing Innovation That Just Saved Traditional Finance From Itself

Crypto bros rejoice! Because what's more exciting than watching Wall Street and traditional finance try to figure out how to use blockchain? I mean, who needs […]

Barry Thompson October 31, 2024

A illustration of Blackrock's giant hand holding a large chunk of Microsoft shares with a sly grin on its face as it casts a vote at an imaginary shareholder meeting; in the background, Bitcoin logos and charts are exploding upwards amidst chaotic market scenes.

Bitcoin

Microsoft Just Dropped the N-Bomb and We’re All About to Get Served a Heaping Plate of Crypto Regret

Mainstream is finally starting to smell like what it used to be - stinky old garbage.

Barry Thompson October 31, 2024

A illustration of a robot sitting at an office desk with its hands on the keyboard and mouse as if it's coding all by itself; Google search results pages filling up behind the computer screen. The background is filled with robotic gears, wires, and circuit boards to emphasize AI technology.

ALPHABET CEO’s Insidious Plan to Ruin Your Retirement Is Finally Paying Off in a MAJOR Way

Satoshi's ghost is still haunting the crypto space and now Google's making a killing off its 'AI bet' - what a joke! Meanwhile, Alphabet Inc. (GOOG) […]

Barry Thompson October 30, 2024

A illustration of a person trapped in a digital cage surrounded by broken computer screens and financial charts going haywire, while a giant hammer labeled 'Cost' comes crashing down on top, with smaller banks represented as tiny figures running away from the chaos.

You Won’t Believe What Happens When Russia Tries to Create a Superpower Currency (And Why It’s About to Blow Up in Their Faces)

Russian Banks Baulk at Digital Ruble Implementation Costs: A Recipe for Disaster.

Barry Thompson October 26, 2024

You Won’t Believe the SHOCKING Reason Why Everyone’s Suddenly Using Blockchain Now

Just another day in crypto land where 'blockchain' is code for 'we've given up on security and scalability'.

Barry Thompson October 23, 2024

A distressed house with a large weight on its roof, symbolizing foreclosure; in the background, an image of Africa's mineral wealth (mines) intertwined with Zimbabwean flags; at the foreground, Kudzai Dominic Chiwenga is shown shaking hands with Russian officials while standing next to a table displaying BRICS New Development Bank documents and gold bars.

You Won’t Believe the Shocking Truth About How BRICS Just Saved Your Grandmas’ House From Foreclosure (Sort Of)

BRICS Bank: The IMF's BFFs or a Genuinely Helpful Alternative? By our favorite satirist.

Barry Thompson October 19, 2024

A illustration of a chaotic stock market scene with Bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies skyrocketing in price, surrounded by memes and cryptocurrency logos, while investors frantically buy and sell memecoin tokens on their computers.

YOU WON’T BELIEVE WHY Memecoin Prices Are Skyrocketing RIGHT NOW (It’s NOT What You Think!)

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Barry Thompson October 19, 2024

A futuristic cityscape with skyscrapers and neon lights, but instead of people walking the streets, robots are seen exchanging goods and services using a digital currency token represented by glowing coins or blocks floating through the air.

Brazilian Aunt of Central Banks Just Unleashed a Total Disaster: What You Need to Know About Their New Digital Ruin

Brazil's CBDC pilot is like that one aunt at the family reunion - everyone wants to be involved but no one knows what they're doing.

Barry Thompson October 15, 2024

You Won’t Believe How One Influencer Made a Whopping 10 Million Dollars Promoting Cryptos That Were About to Tank (Literally)

When you think 'influencers' in the cryptocurrency space, who comes to mind? Not exactly the most trustworthy bunch if we're being honest. Case in point: MrBeast […]

Barry Thompson October 15, 2024

A frazzled Aussie investor frantically tries to sell their Ether on an exchange while another person in the background is buying up all available ETH at a frantic pace; amidst chaos and panic.

Aussies Finally Get to Live Their Wildest Crypto Dreams: Ether ETF Launch Sparks Unbridled Panic and Regret

Sydney's Crypto Party: Australia Launches First Ether ETF (Yawn)... Just Kidding! Monochrome Asset Management has finally done what we've all been waiting for - launched the […]

Barry Thompson October 15, 2024

A illustration of a king sitting on his throne with an overflowing wallet in one hand and a chart showing plummeting stock prices in the other. The background is filled with flames representing market volatility.

Crypto Kingpin Caught Red-Handed: Insiders Cash Out Bigly as SUi Token Plummets Into Dark Abyss

Sui Token's Shady Past: Insider Selling Alert! - Crypto Bro Exposed!.

Barry Thompson October 14, 2024

A illustration depicting a cityscape at sunset with skyscrapers and neon lights fading away in the background, surrounded by scattered papers, broken computers, and cryptocurrency symbols on fire. A giant clock ticking down to November 30th dominates the foreground.

Crypto Bro Paradise Closes Down – Your Money Just Became a Game of Russian Roulette With Unregulated ‘Hiring’ Pages

The crypto bros' favorite playground just got a whole lot smaller - Singapore-based Fairdesk is shutting down its operations due to regulatory concerns, because who needs […]

Barry Thompson October 14, 2024

A comical illustration depicting Peter Todd sitting at his desk with a 'Wanted' poster featuring Satoshi Nakamoto's face, while holding a red X marked through it and looking worried. In the background, there is a cityscape of New York City with skyscrapers and people walking around, symbolizing wealth and danger. The overall tone should be humorous yet ominous.